


Any Kind of Sacrifice

by Cait_frost_11



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: 3.16, Angst, F/M, Quickwest, Sacrifice, Season 3, post-episode 3.15, really sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-10-04 19:49:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10287884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cait_frost_11/pseuds/Cait_frost_11
Summary: Jesse is crushed after Wally is trapped in the SpeedForce, and she makes the ultimate sacrifice to save the man she loves.





	

Jesse lay flat on her back on the bed she used to share with Wally in the West house. Wally had taken over Barry's old room, and though she technically had Iris' old room she and Wally would almost always sleep together in his room. 

Now she lay here alone, eyes dry of tears and her body so exhausted she could barely lift her head. She had tried running to distract herself, but all it made her do was think more about Wally. All their late night runs; the races that almost always ended in laughter and kisses before they even reached the finish line. And by the time she had gotten back to the West's house she had burned off so many calories that she didn't have strength or energy left to go downstairs and get one of the super-protein bars that were always kept on hand in the house of the speedsters. 

All she could do was lay there and think of Wally. Gone. Suffering a fate worse than death for all of eternity. The pain of that fact threatened to engulf her viscously and unapologetically. 

She didn't hear Joe come through the front door, and didn't even realize anyone else was in the house until there sounded a tentative knock on the door to the bedroom. 

She didn't have the strength or energy to answer, but Joe opened the door and came in anyway. When he saw her lying on the bed, he first thought she was asleep, but after a quick double take he saw that she was really just near fainting. 

"Jesse!" Joe said, somewhat panicked. He realized from comparing her symptoms to those of Barry and Wally that between burning so many calories while running and her extremely high metabolism, she was dangerously low on fuel. He ran downstairs and gathered a handful of high calorie protein bars from the cupboard and brought them up to her. "Jesse. I brought you some of the speed-bars." 

She barely responded, but was clearly refusing the food. Joe knew it was dangerous for the speedsters to be so low, but his son's girlfriend had no interest in gaining strength back, even when her health was at risk. 

He sat on the bed next to her and practically forced the food into her stomach. He watched her quickly gain back her strength, and finally sit up when she was able. Her eyes once again filled with tears in remembering what had happened to Wally. 

"Joe," she sobbed, and Joe gave in and let out a cry as well. He pulled her in against his chest and they both dried their eyes of tears. 

Jesse suddenly sat up and wiped her eyes. "I've gotta go, I can't just sit around and do nothing. I—I might have an idea." She sped off and in a flash showed up in the S.T.A.R. labs cortex. Cisco and Barry were the only ones in there; Caitlin was off tinkering with the remaining section of Wally's suit in attempt to trace where in the speed force he was, and Iris had gone home. Of course the one persons she wanted to see was nowhere to be found. It took her a second to realize what Cisco and Barry were doing at first, but then she figured that they were about to be vibed into the speed force after Wally. 

"Wait! I'm coming too," she insisted. 

"No," Barry forbade her. "I need someone here to watch over the city, and I would call Oliver, but he has got his own city with its own problems." 

She knew he had a point, and besides, she had her own idea to carry out. 

"Where's Julian?" Jesse asked Cisco. "I need to ask him something."

"Ummm. I think he's in one of the labs. I don't really know." He looked up at the speedster. "We are going to get Wally back. You know that, right?"

She nodded, but she had her own plans to save her boyfriend. 

She found Julian in one of the labs, right where Cisco had predicted. He only looked up from his research papers enough to see who it was.

"Oh, hello Jesse." He payed her very little attention, incorrectly assumed that she was only in there to work on something of her own. He looked up a minute later when he realized she was still standing there waiting for him. "What do you need? Look, I've done everything I can to try to help Wally, but speed force travel isn't really my forte."

"I know. That's not what I'm here for. Well, in a way it is."

"Well what do you need?" Julian asked, impatient with her nervous chatter. 

She took a deep breath, knowing he probably would reject the question she was about to ask. "I need to speak to him. Savitar."

"And you think I'm going to keep being your personal communication device? That's like texting someone who's in the same room as you."

She hadn't thought of that. If she wanted to talk to Savitar, she could talk right to him now. He could tell from her reaction exactly what she was planning. 

"You can't face him, even just to bargain. He isn't going to go with anyone's terms but his own, and if he feels like it he will kill you without hesitation," Julian tried to stop her, but her mind was made up. 

"Swear that you won't tell the others where I am going," she said savagely. 

Julian saw that she wasn't going to take no for an answer, so he reluctantly agreed. 

Jesse ran back into the cortex to find that Cisco and Caitlin wee still there, but Barry was no where to be seen. "Is he in?" She asked, speaking of Barry making it into the speed force. 

"Yeah. Once he's out he'll contact us and we will go find him, wherever they are," Cisco explained to the only good speedster left in the city. 

She nodded, glad for the freedom. Barry would never even allow her to think about meeting with Savitar. It would be easier to get out with Barry out of the way. She started to walk away, but Caitlin's voice stopped her. 

"Where are you going? With Savitar out in the world you really shouldn't be wandering."

"I just want to check on something," Jesse lied. Check on something and bargain with an evil speed god.

"Just be careful."

"I always am," Jesse reassured with a false smile. She spend off into the dark of night and stopped in an empty lot far enough to keep civilians out of harm's way if things went south. 

She didn't really know how to call Savitar, so she screamed his name as loud as she could. It seemed to work because barely a second later the evil speedster flashed into her view. 

"Come to bow down to me?" He roared in his vanity. 

"No. I want you to bring Wally out of the speed force," Jesse said. 

"Ahh. You're boyfriend. The superhero couple of this pathetic excuse for a city," he mocked. "You see, I can't do that. Someone has to endure the hell of the speed force or it will collapse. No speed force means no speed. I won't let that happen."

"Please. I'll do anything," she begged. 

"Anything?" He grinned. 

She nodded enthusiastically. 

"What about," he paused, relishing her agony. "Would you take his place? Trade your life for his? Endure the torture, the agony, the weight of the speed force hell?"

"I—" her voice caught in her throat, shocked to silence by the unexpected request. 

Savitar took this as hesitation. "I see, well. You really aren't all you seem to be. I guess your love for Wally isn't passed halfway." Before she had regained her focus he ran at her and ran his dagger through her side. "You're lucky I didn't drive that through your heart," he said over her collapsed form and ran off, leaving her lying on the pavement. 

She gasped for breath and ran as best she could back to S.T.A.R. labs where Caitlin jumped up and grabbed her supplies as soon as she saw Jesse stumble in, covered in her own blood. 

"What did you do?" Caitlin asked exasperatedly. 

"Something really dumb," Jesse groaned. 

Julian walked into the med bay and wasn't shocked at all to see Caitlin stitching up a gaping gash in the speedster's side. "I told you that was a horrible idea. You're lucky he got your side and not your heart," he chided. 

"Yeah. That's what he told me."

"Wait. Explain to me what is going on. I can tell it was Savitar, but are you saying this wasn't an accident? You went looking for him? And you knew?" Caitlin asked the last question directly to Julian. He only nodded. "What were you thinking?"

Jesse carefully and painfully sat up as Caitlin put a patch of gauze over the stitches. "I know how to get Wally out of the speed force."

"Yeah, so do we. Barry is in there looking for him right now," Caitlin insisted. 

Jesse just shook her head. "It doesn't work that way. You can't just march in and pull someone back out. The speedster trapped within the force is what keeps it going. I can't let Wally be that speedster."

Caitlin and Julian both realized at the same time what Jesse meant. 

"And who are you to decide that you will be that speedster?" Julian asked. 

"Jesse, you can't do that for Wally. When he comes back and finds what you did he would never forgive himself. You can't make him live with that," Caitlin insisted. 

"I have to. It's the only way."

Jesse sped off and returned a few minutes later clutching her gauze patched side. She handed Caitlin a folded piece of paper. 

"What is this?" The scientist asked. 

"When Wally gets back, I need you to give him this for me. Make sure he gets it, and make sure he reads it."

"No. You are going to give it to him yourself. Barry is going to find Wally, and he's going to get him back to reality," Caitlin insisted. 

"I already explained. Someone has to stay in the speed force prison," Jesse grunted, still holding her hand tenderly over the stitches. 

"Even if we were to let you do this—" Julian started, but Jesse cut in. 

"I'm going this whether you give me your permission or not. I'm an adult now, I make my own decisions."

"You're hurt!" Caitlin protested. 

"Wally's in a lot more pain than I'm in right now." That shut everybody up. The words of the prophecy rang through all their heads and they shuddered into submission. "Just... Make sure Wally gets this. I'm going to talk to Joe and Iris one last time before I go. Tell Barry, when he gets back, that he was an amazing mentor and friend. And Cisco, too," Jesse tried to remember everyone she was about to leave behind. 

"It won't be the last time," Caitlin promised the speedster. "Once Wally and Barry get back we will find a way to get Savitar back in the speed force and bring you out."

Jesse smiled gratefully. She wanted to talk to Iris and Joe one more time, but she didn't want Wally trapped any longer than she could help, so she began to say her goodbyes to the two in front of her. 

"Julian, I haven't known you long, but you have helped us all so much. Thank you for that."

He smiled painfully, still in disbelief that he was allowing her to give up her life to Savitar. "It was a pleasure knowing you, Jesse Quick."

Jesse then turned to Caitlin, and the older of the two women pulled the younger into a tight embrace. The pressure painfully cut into the stitches that had already taken far too much trouble, but Jesse bore the pain knowing this was likely the last time she would have the opportunity to be held in the embrace of her friend. 

"Thank you so much for everything you have done, Cait," the speedster said with tears in her eyes. "You have been an amazing friend. I hope I get to see you again some day."

Caitlin pulled away and wiped away the tears that had fallen onto her cheeks. "Hang on in there, and we will find a way to get you out."

"Thank you both so much," Jesse said one last time, before running off to the West house to talk to Joe. 

She explained to him what she had to do and like Caitlin and Julian he tried to talk her out of it. 

"It is not going to last long," she reassured him, though she knew she was telling him a lie. "Barry won't come out of the speed force without Wally, so me going in will bring them both back to get Savitar back into the prison. The two of them against Savitar is a better match up than just me against him, and once he is defeated they will come find me and bring me out."

Joe was satisfied enough with this promise, though he didn't know that it was all a lie. Jesse really had no hope that she would make it out of the speed force once she had taken Wally's place. 

She hugged him for what she knew to be the last time, only then realizing that he had a distinct smell. Of home cooked food, and coffee, and of something else she could only describe as safety. The young speedster finally, with much willpower and difficulty, broke away from the detective and dashed off towards Barry and Iris' apartment before she could change her mind. 

Iris was sitting at her table typing up a report on the latest metahuman update for CCPN, but she closed her laptop and set it aside when she saw Jesse come in. The speedster sat across from her, and related the situation for the last time. Jesse didn't want to just leave and not try to help the situation her friend and her mentor were in though, so she gave Iris the advice she wished could apply to her and Wally. 

"I know that you are angry with Barry. And I know that he has been so focused on saving you that everything else in his mind has been pushed aside. And I understand that it seems like he only proposed to change the future, but it's more than that. He wouldn't be this desperate to keep you alive if he didn't truly love you and want to spend the rest of his life with you. Not the rest of your few months, but a long, happy life to a ripe old age. He loves you. He lives for you. And you deserve a man as loving and amazing as him. And he couldn't have a more wonderful and beautiful girl the you, Iris. Thank you for everything you have given for me. I've been so happy these few weeks I've been here. I just wanted to thank you." Jesse wiped a renegade tear that had slipped from her eye onto her cheek and gave Iris a small smile. 

Iris just looked at her skeptically. "Why do I feel like that was your dictated suicide note?" 

Jesse laughed nervously. "I just— I'm not sure— I don't know how long—" 

Iris cut her off with a hand on her arm. "You're not coming back, are you?"

Jesse couldn't lie any longer. "No, I don't think I am."

"You don't have to do this. No one expects this from you. You could just go on with your life. Find a city that's in danger. Be the hero. Find someone to tell your deepest secret and become part of your team. Fall in love. Make some sacrifices but know that in the end everything will turn out okay."

"That what I'm doing. I found a city that's in danger. I have all of you to tell about what I do. You are my team. I fell in love with Wally. I'm making a sacrifice for what I believe but I know that when this is all over you guys will be okay."

Iris wiped the tears from her eyes and pulled her little brother's girlfriend into a nearly suffocating hug. "You are a hero," she whispered into her ear. 

"Thank you. Watch out for Wally for me, okay?" Jesse asked, and Iris just nodded her head into Jesse's shoulder. 

It took all of Jesse's willpower to break away from the hug. That last hug she would ever receive, she realized. With whatever resolve she had left she ran back to the place she had met the god of speed earlier that night. 

"I'm accepting your offer!" She shouted, knowing the speedster would come immediately. Sure enough, he flashed into view along with a breech into the speed force. 

"You need to go in first or the force will collapse," Savitar growled. "Say goodbye to your pathetic friends and you can see them come out of the prison. I am a man of my word."

"Fine." She took one last look at the city she had grown to love and ran into the breech. 

She walked around a city that was almost identical to the one she lived in, just with an eerie quality. It didn't take her long to find Barry, his connection to the force pulled her in. He was watching Wally, who was engrossed in staring into what seemed to be total blank space, though he seemed to be seeing something there. 

"Jesse! What are you doing here? I told you to stay and watch over the city!" Barry chided. 

"I know, but I figured out how to get you and Wally both out. I don't have time to explain, but come on we have to hurry. We can't leave the city unprotected. Meet me by the waterfront. I'll get Wally."

"Jesse?" He broke out of his trance and stared in disbelief at his girlfriend. 

"Hey," she knew she was seeing him for the last time, but she had no idea what to say. 

"Thank you for coming for me," he said meekly. 

She walked up to the place where he was standing and met her lips with his. He returned the kiss passionately and when they broke apart he smiled. "What was that for?"

"I love you," she choked out through tears. "Please don't ever forget that."

"Jess, what is going on? I know you love me. I love you more than anything."

"I know."

Wally pulled his hand away from her hips and realized that it was covered in blood. "Jesse! You're hurt!"

She looked down at her bleeding side and groaned. Her stitches must have come out during the trip through the speed force. "It's no big deal. I just need you to know that you mean the world to me. I love you."

Wally wiped away the tears that had escaped down Jesse's cheeks. "Jess, what is going on? You're scaring me."

She kissed him again and shook off his questions. "Let's go. Barry's waiting for us by the waterfront." 

She took his hand in hers and together they ran to the designated meeting spot. Barry was waiting and he immediately called out the signal for Cisco to bring them back. A breech opened up a moment later and Jesse stopped the two from going through so she could say goodbye. 

"Jess, what are you doing?" Wally questioned. He began to get really worried that this was all a dream of the speed force's concoction. She walked over to Barry and have him a tight hug. 

"Thank you for everything you have done for me. All the stuff you've taught me, and the family you have me in Central City." Barry just looked at her worriedly, as if she had lost her mind. 

She turned back to Wally and hugged him like she would never let go. "Please don't be angry. I love you more than anything in the world." She kissed him and he returned the action, and she took it all in as long as she could. She forced herself to pull away, and when the other two speedsters were engulfed into the breech she stayed far enough away to keep from being sucked into its pull. The breech closed before they could stop it and she knew they wouldn't be able to get back through to rescue her. She knew that there was no going back, and her most desperate hope was that her memories of days of the past would be enough to pull her through the tribulation ahead. 

Wally tried to run back through the breech to pull Jesse back out of the hell, but it closed before he got in. Despite Cisco's best efforts to reopen the portal, he found that he was unable. Barry ran his two metahuman friends back to the lab, Cisco unable to run that far or fast, and Wally too lost to make the trip himself. 

Caitlin and Julian were already discussing ways to get Savitar into the speed force and Jesse out. They began going over plans with Barry, Cisco, and Wally the moment they got back, before the trio even knew that Jesse giving herself up was all part of a plan. Wally was furious with himself when he found out what he had caused for her, and he became angry with Jesse for sacrificing herself and leaving him alone. His fury threatened to consume his presence of mind until he remembered Jesse's words, "Please don't be angry. I love you more than anything in the world." 

Wally left the cortex in silence but didn't make it past the hall before having to stop to release the tears that had built up behind his eyes. He didn't hear Caitlin approach until she put a light hand on his shoulder. 

"I know this is a really awful time, but before Jesse left she wrote this note and told me to be sure that you got it and read it," the scientist said gently. 

Wally grasped the sheet of paper Caitlin held out to him, searching for every last bit of Jesse he could find. Caitlin left him alone to read the letter, and he slowly made his way to the opening of the pipeline, where he and Jesse spent a lot of their alone time together. He burst into sobs when he found her favorite sweater still thrown across the floor from the day Cisco had a war with the thermostat. Wally almost laughed in remembering that event. Caitlin's powers had been acting up, and the entire lab was frigid as a result. Cisco had turned the temperature up to rediculous heights, making every room scalding hot except the one Caitlin was sitting in. He sat on the floor against the wall and held the sweater up to his nose, breathing in the scent of her perfume. He eventually willed himself to open up and read the note left to him. 

Wally,   
I want to start with explaining what happened. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. Everything was empty. I need for you to be okay again. At any cost. So I met up with Savitar and tried to bargain for your release. He revealed to me that a speedster had to be within the prison at all times, otherwise it would collapse and there would be no speedsters. His only offer was that I take your place. It was the only thing I could do. Although, before I could answer, he stabbed me in the side. It wasn't serious. Caitlin stitched me up, and I explained the situation. Caitlin said that you would never forgive yourself for what I'm doing. Please do. Forgive, but don't forget me. I know the team and I know they are going to attempt to save me, but I'm not coming back. I wish I could, but it won't work out this way. I need you and Barry to defeat Savitar for me. I'm really sorry I can't be there to help directly, but I know that you will be able to do it. You will always be my love, but I want you to move on. Not too fast, but some day you'll have to get out again. You'll  
meet someone and start something new. Someday have some kids. Live a life. Love your wife and kids the way you have loved me, and don't close yourself off to the world. I don't know what tortures this hell is going to concoct for me, but I do know that the memory of you will keep me moving forward and fighting through. I love you, Kid Flash. I love you, Wally West. 

The tears that had been coming around on and off through the whole letter finally came tumbling over his eyelids and down his face. "I love you, Jesse Wells. I love you, Jesse Quick," he choked out through the sobs that racked his body. The memories of his beloved girl flooded his mind and he knew exactly what he had to do. That monster was going to pay. He owed it to Jesse. 

It took him a few minutes to get through his anger towards her for sacrificing herself for him, but he knew that no matter what she ever did he would always love her. Wally sat on the floor crying into Jesse's sweater and clutched the letter marked with her small, even handwriting, the last things he had left of her beautiful life.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm slightly sorry for writing this, and I actually cried while working on it. I hope this doesn't actually happen in the episode because that would kill me.


End file.
